Sometimes, when you wake up before 6:00 am for no good reason and decide it's important that you have soup for breakfast, you don't want a Wolfgang Puck hearty penne kind of soup. Nope. You don't want that, and you don't want Amy's Organic lentil soup, either. You don't even want your leftover homemade sweet potato chowder, which any reasonable bacon-eater would agree is a damn good soup.

What you want is ramen: long, bland noodles boiled for however long you feel like boiling them, because hey, it's not like you're going for an al dente texture. Ramen: with little floaty bits that may or may not have once been sea monkeys. Seasoned with chunks of bouillon-flavored sodium from a foil packet. Ramen: if you're feeling highly motivated, you might crack an egg into it. It's an egg! It's fancy!

This is why it's a shame that I seem to have stopped purchasing ramen when I stopped living entirely on student loans. Maybe I'll have mac and cheese for breakfast instead. It's not ramen, but at least preparing it will require that I open a foil packet.