"Return of the King" balled my rog. Uruked my hai. Nazzed my gul.
I will say one thing, and one thing only, in criticism:

"A Not-Ode on Liv Tyler"
Oh, Liv Tyler,
What?
I'm sorry.
I didn't catch that.
You see,
the thing is,
you keep whispering, and
I CAN'T FUCKING HEAR YOU.